Pine Valley

A series of waves that makes for some tough putts on the 2nd

The fearsome 5th plays at about 220 yards for members and alongside the similar 13th at The Addington is perhaps the best long par three I have ever played

Hell's Half-Acre dominates the 7th hole, playing on your mind until you have crossed it with your second shot

Approaching the 8th hole's diabolical twin greens
 

It's hard to overlook the par three 10th when selecting a favourite hole, but in reality about 10 or 12 holes were my favourite!

Playing the 13th was a dream come true, having first seen the hole in a book of the world's best courses at my grandparents' house when I was a child

Looking up the 15th fairway and across to the 16th green

The 18th hole: almost at the end of an indescribable experience

Course name: Pine Valley
Location: Clementon, New Jersey, USA
Four Word Course Review: 18 magnificent golf holes

From the moment I was invited to play Pine Valley, I started to dream about it: driving down the secluded road, seeing the front gate, walking onto the 1st tee, trying not to fan one right on the 5th, flying Hell's Half-Acre, dodging the Devil's Asshole, drawing one into the 13th, tensing up on the 15th... that is a lot of dreaming!

So it's saying a lot that the reality is even better, significantly better, than I had imagined it would be. The magic of a day at Pine Valley can't be described, but I'll still try!

Spotting the amusement park on Berlin Road, a massive smile arrived on my face. As I spied the first green through the trees beside East Atlantic Avenue, I nearly drove off the road. Crossing the railway line and seeing the club logo at the gate, my heart hit 200bpm. It didn't seem to slow down all day and that smile never did go away.

First stop was some breakfast in the clubhouse, which reminded me of my grandparents' home: remarkably comfortable but not the least bit pretentious, great food, a warm welcome. Everything a great club should be.

Next stop, the range. Double-ended, distances measured to all eight to 10 flags from every bay, short game area nearby. I am not a practice range guy, a lot of the time I don't even bother with a practice putt, but if all ranges were this good I'd put in half an hour before every round.

But of course it's really all about the course, which is where Pine Valley really put itself ahead of everything else I have played. There isn't a single hole that comes close to being weak. And further, the holes gel together perfectly to create a cohesive course.

The corridors are very wide and the carries over sandy waste area are really quite short, meaning the visual intimidation is far greater than the reality of the shots you face. Perhaps the most difficult aspect of playing Pine Valley was the sensory overload. There is just so much to look at regardless of where you are on the course that it is hard to maintain concentration. I have never seen, for want of a better term, so much architecture on the ground - so many features that can come into play and that draw your eye and your mind to them.

The first four-hole loop may not feature any of the most famous holes on the course, but it introduces you to what is great about Pine Valley. The drives don't demand too much of you, but it's essential to put the ball in very specific places to allow the flag to be attacked, staying midful of the least damaging places to miss (usually short). The greens are bold and unique. Not one green at Pine Valley is forgettable, nor could any green be mistaken for another. The steep terrain is utilised perfectly.

It's hard to believe as you walk off the 4th green that the course is about to step up a notch, but it immediately does, with the long par three 5th justifiably one of the most famous holes in golf, playing uphill to a benched green with nothing good on offer if you miss the steep green to the right (nothing good happens if you miss most of the fairways or greens anywhere, to be fair!).

With only two par fives on the course, I love that both are genuine three-shotters. The 7th has only been reached and held in two shots once in almost 100 years thanks to its length and the fearsome Hell's Half-Acre that looms about 300 yards from the tee. The 15th, meanwhile, required a driver and two hybrid shots for me to get pin high - 570 yards climbing uphill and tightening towards the green. Again, the two holes are completely unlike one another, something George Crump achieved across the board even on holes of similar length or on similar land.

The 8th is just a tick over 300 yards, but may be one of the toughest pars on the course due to its blind drive that will likely leave a downhill lie approaching a tiny, two tiered green surrounded by sand (the hole has two greens, adjacent to each other and both very similar in size and design). I have heard of top amateaurs making both 2 and 11 on the hole, and if scoring spread is any indication of quality, it doesn't get better than that!

The 9th is a more muscular par four also featuring two greens that takes you to one of the course's most famous holes, the short 10th with its legendary Devil's Asshole bunker short of the green - deeper than it is wide! Any miss is punished by the many bunkers that ring the green, but I have never seen anything as fearsome on a golf course as "the DA".

The back nine keeps the pace going with the often overlooked but brilliant par four 11th playing through a valley to an amphitheatre green, before another par four at the 12th that although short packs a punch due to its tricky green.

The 13th might sum up Pine Valley perfectly. There are safe options on every shot, but the green, following a good drive, sits tantalisingly in a sea of sand, demanding a long hook and refusing to be ignored. To play to the right, pitch on and two-putt secures an easy five, but the lure of a birdie or par is just so great that I am sure very few players take that route when in range of the green.

Some choose the drop shot 14th hole as the weakest at Pine Valley, but I for one really liked it. The final par three, it completes a set of one shot holes that have remarkable variety in length, terrain and shotmaking challenge.

Following the ball breaking 15th is another unsung hero of Pine Valley, the 16th. Like the 6th, a sandy waste creates a diagonal driving hazard, with the approach shorter and the angle better the further right you aim, lengthening the carry. If you steer one left, your approach is directly towards the flanking lake, which you have just driven over at the 15th.

With two holes to go, Pine Valley throws up a fourth short par four, ostensibly a huge birdie chance close to home. But as with all of the holes here that are short for their par, the challenge is far greater than the length suggests, with the approach played blind to a green set atop a hill and guarded on all sides by bunkers. The surface itself is steep and fast, making that birdie less likely again.

And so, well before you'd like, you're standing on the 18th tee, looking at one of the best vistas on a course filled with them and wishing it wasn't almost over.

The drive is downhill to a wide fairway, setting up a second back uphill ever so slightly to a collecting green fronted by a hillside of sand and a creek. For the width of the drive and friendliness of the green gathering balls that hit its edges, this is one tough hole, calling for a steely nerve as you stand in the fairway most likely holding a mid or long iron.

And just like that you've shaken hands and it's over. Inside to tally up the (surely dispiriting) numbers and enjoy a bowl of the club's signature turtle soup (which tasted surprisingly good!).

If I have never felt so excited driving into a golf course, I had never been so disappointed to be leaving one as I drove back across the home hole and out the gate. Nothing in golf is perfect, but Pine Valley is without doubt as close to perfection as I have ever or, I suspect, am ever likely to see and until I return I will dream of it constantly.